They look so pretty in spades…

A little royal for Valentines Day. Lovely. I didn’t play it very well, but I tend to get tricky with royals as I have a showoff’s need to show them down. Left a few chips on the table, but I was surprised that he was betting into me, and didn’t want to spoil his fun…

TEXAS_HOLDEM, NO_LIMIT,
Seat 1: sv_Anna (2,380 in chips)
Seat 2: mamant19 (2,000 in chips)
Seat 3: Aches_High (2,920 in chips)
Seat 4: dermoth (1,960 in chips)
Seat 5: bhangraman5 (1,560 in chips)
Seat 6: omonia6 (2,580 in chips)
Seat 8: AGILEGRECIA (1,680 in chips)
Seat 9: rppyrdok (1,720 in chips)
Seat 10: Sogi74 (1,210 in chips)
ANTES/BLINDS
mamant19 posts small blind (10), Aches_High posts big blind (20),PRE-FLOP
dermoth calls 20, bhangraman5 calls 20, omonia6 folds, AGILEGRECIA calls 20, rppyrdok folds, Sogi74 folds, sv_Anna folds, mamant19 folds, Aches_High checks.

FLOP [board cards: 8H,KS,TS ]
Aches_High bets 20, dermoth raises to 80, bhangraman5 calls 80, AGILEGRECIA raises to 200, Aches_High folds, dermoth calls 200, bhangraman5 folds.

TURN [board cards: 8H,KS,TS,AS ]
dermoth checks, AGILEGRECIA bets 250, dermoth calls 250.

RIVER [board cards: 8H,KS,TS,AS,QD ]
dermoth bets 500, AGILEGRECIA folds.

SHOWDOWN
dermoth shows [ QS,JS ]
dermoth wins 1,090.

SUMMARY
Dealer: sv_Anna
Pot: 1,090
sv_Anna, loses 0
mamant19, loses 10
Aches_High, loses 40
dermoth, bets 470, collects 1,090, net 620
bhangraman5, loses 100
omonia6, loses 0
AGILEGRECIA, loses 470
rppyrdok, loses 0
Sogi74, loses 0

Meet the old Moth, same as the new Moth

Well, similar to the new Moth, anyway. Here we are, two and a half years later, and I’m back where I began. What’s been happening?

Well, I set up a beautiful new blog, on my own servers. Gorgeous design, loads of bells and whistles, it were bloody brilliant. Then, I forgot to pay my hosting company, and the whole thing disappeared into the aether, never to be seen again.

Then, I quit playing poker professionally, and got a job doing something quite similar: I became a charity fundraiser. I’ve raised just under a milli0n pounds for charity in the last two years, and I have to say, I’m a much happier person now. There are a few reasons for this -

1. I have a more stable income. It’s fairly paltry, but it’s reliable. I like that.

2. I’m doing something that benefits other people. In fact I’ve raised just shy of a million pounds in the last two years. I like that, too.

3. I’m interacting with people again. One of the worst things about playing online poker is that it’s a very solitary endeavour, and I think towards the end of my “career”, I was going a bit stir crazy.

But, despite all that, I do still play a little poker, from time to time. And I’m currently running impossibly badly, so I’m sure there’ll be plenty of opportunities for posting here in the future. Until then, I think I’m going to have  alittle fiddle with the theme…

Meet the new Moth, same as the old Moth

Hello!

This blog has relocated. To catch up with the further adventures of me, please point your browser at http://www.pokermoth.net.

Ain’t nothing goin’ on but the rent

I’m listening to a lot of music from 1972 at the moment, FOR A VERY GOOD REASON, hence the title of this post.

I’m playing a lot of PLO, the odd NLHE tourney, and generally keeping my head down. There’s not a lot to blog about. I nearly wrote something about Ivey and Shulman in the WSOPME, but… I didn’t.

So, here I am, filling space. I’ll post something worthwhile soon, I reckon.

Some random thoughts on iPoker

I’ve been playing a  lot on iPoker of late. I’ve had a Titan account for about a year now, but I’ve never really spent much time there until recently. However, I’ve decided to build the old bankroll with some bonuswhoring, and these days, that means playing on lots of iPoker skins. And I have some THOUGHTS on the software. Random THOUGHTS. In no particular order…

1. The site has the most censorious chatbox I’ve ever seen. “Moron” is verboten. I think “Idiot” might be too. On the other hand, I’ve just seen a player sit down on my table called “CuntOfSpades”. Bit odd.

2. iPoker uses rubbish avatars. Oh, look, I can be a cowboy! Or a businessman! Or a mobster! What fun. Now, obviously, anyone with sense is going to disable these ridiculous gewgaws immediately, but other people will still be able to see them, even if you can’t. So make sure you set your avatar to the “slutty woman in low-cut dress” setting. I’ve lost count of the number of times that some knuckle-dragging moron has cackhandedly tried to bluff me off a pot and then  called me a bitch when I’ve checkraised them. Poker-transvestitism can be very profitable.

3. The hand history browser is just plain weird; halfway between a graphical interface and a text one, but with none of the benefits of either. Hell, Betfair might only be able to open a Notepad document, as if it were 1988 or something, but at least you can copy the damn text out of Notepad. POP FACT! iPoker is the third largest poker network in the world behind Stars and Tilt. And yet they can’t even manage a functional hand history browser. And that’s not all…

4. Table resizing. You can’t do it. Srsly. You can have your tables at a standard size, or you can opt for a minimised view. Now, this isn’t that uncommon; Cryptologic used to work in a similar fashion, for instance. What makes iPoker special is that switching from full size tables to the minimised view causes the software to have a seizure, especially is you have more than one table open. It’s particularly catastrophic if you’ve been playing for a while, as the software feels the need to reload the entire contents of the chat box before it will et you play again, for reasons that are completely unfathomable. You may as well go and put the kettle on while it tries to sort itself out.Again, given the size of the network, this is inexcusable.

5. Otherwise… it’s a half-decent poker network. There are a lot of bad players out ther (hello, William Hill!), the Omaha tables are usually pretty busy (Stud, not so much), and they have good tournaments with a reasonably friendly blind structure. And if you’re bonuswhoring, there are a ton of skins with a ton of decent bonuses to chase.

Oh, and it’s rigged, obviously. I know this because someone told me so.

Scare card

Here’s a fun little quandary for you.

———————————————-

http://www.holdemmanager.net

PL Omaha $0.20(BB)

SB ($19.73)
BB ($9.94)
UTG ($42.11)
Dermoth ($15.36)
CO ($11.98)
Button ($28.29)

Let’s get the introductions out of the way first; the BB is quite loose passive, and the cutoff is VERY loose passive; I haven’t seen him raise in 60 hands, and he plays 60% of his hands. (Yes, I am using tracking software again). As for me, I’m a little bit tilty after losing a 90/10 race a few hands ago.

SB posts (SB) $0.10
BB posts (BB) $0.20

Dealt to Dermoth 4h 7c Ad Ac
fold,
Dermoth calls $0.20

I have a bad habit of limping Aces in Omaha.  This is partly because I’ve been playing a lot of full ring PLO, where preflop raising isn’t much better than setting fire to your money. However, I’ve moved to 6max games in the last few days, and I’m a lot busier preflop in the short-handed game, but I still limp a lot of aces for disguise, and the opportunity to reraise shortstacks. No-one’s short enough here to justify that angle, though. I should have raised.

CO raises to $0.90
fold, fold,
BB calls $0.70

So, a raise from the loose-passive player (who I’ve never seen raise preflop before), followed by a call from the other LAP.  The pot’s now big enough for me to 3bet and get all the chips in on the flop. Thing is, I’m almost positive the Cutoff has aces as well, and the chances are they’re better than mine. Nonetheless, I decide to pot it back at them and worry about my side cards on the flop (if nothing else, we can divvy up the BB’s money)…

Dermoth raises to $3.70
CO calls $2.80
BB calls $2.80

FLOP ($11.20) Ah 8c 4s

OK, so the Cutoff doesn’t have aces.  I’m pretty sure about that, now. The problem here is that my 3bet preflop has effectively turned my hand face-up; there’s no way I can earn any more money by betting here. So, let the checking begin!

check, check, check,

TURN ($11.20) Ah 8c 4s 8d
BB bets $0.20

Owoosay… lol? I couldn’t have dealt this any better myself, and, err, what’s with the minbet? It has to be a spectacularly pathetic blocking bet with an 8 in his hand, surely?  No point raising here, I just call and hope that he fills up on the river.

Dermoth calls $0.20
CO calls $0.20

RIVER ($11.80) Ah 8c 4s 8d 8s
BB bets $6.04 (AI)

Oh, fuck off! And the hand history doesn’t reflect the incredible speed with which all the remaining chips went in the middle; with two players still to act, it’s a hell of a bluff. On the other hand, I have the second nuts, I’m getting almost 3/1, and… he’s blatantly got the case eight. Or KK? He could have KK. The minbet on the turn  is deranged, but maybe… ah, fuck it, I call.

Dermoth calls $6.04
CO calls $6.04

Oh, fuck off! But there’s no time to digest this disastrous news before the showdown…

Dermoth shows 4h 7c Ad Ac
(Flop 76.1%, Turn 100.0%)

CO shows Kh 3h Jd Ks
(Flop 5.9%, Turn 0.0%)

So the Cutoff has KK! They can’t both have them, can they?

BB shows 7s Qs 6d As
(Flop 18.1%, Turn 0.0%)

!!!

Dermoth wins $28.92, and is very, very surprised…

———————————————-

The moral of the story; don’t play Omaha if you don’t know the rules. It had never even occurred to me that he could be shoving a Hold’em Boat. Although I would have been sick to my stomach if I had pulled out a hero fold there (and I very nearly did), the pain would have been lessened by the thought of the Big Blind trying to work out why he lost to KK. As it stands, he’s probably bemoaning his terrible luck… that lesson will whave to wait for another day.

Omaha is hard. But endlessly entertaining.

Pokertube Review! Aurrrt-zee Millions Cash Game 2009

Man, it’s been a while since I basked in the reflected glory of Pokertube. Possibly because there hasn’t been that much quality poker telly to write about of late?

UNTIL NOW, that is. I direct your attention to the magnificent Aurrrrt-zee Millions Cash Game 2009, probably the best bit of poker-watchy you’ll see in a long time. There are links at the bottom of the post, but first! Some words.

Americans can’t say “Aussie”. (Or “Craig”. Or “bloody wanker”). They can say “Ozzy”, as in Osbourne, but seem to be incapable of making the exact same sounds when spelled slightly differently.  Barry Tompkins, (who plays Presenting Man on the show), is particularly bad at saying Aussie, which I mentioned in passing when I reviewed the first Aussie Millions , back in 2007.This hasn’t changed.

I also mentioned Michael Konik’s obsession with the word “prohibitive”. This has changed, because Konik has been replaced by Bart Hanson, who does an extremely good job of calling the action, but is obsessed with the word “bluffcatcher”, to the point where I started to think he was subliminally advertising some ghastly product of that name. As if that wasn’t enough, the sensation of being subtly reprogrammed to buy BLUFFCATCHER products is heightened by a truly bizarre addition to the AM format – background music. Weird, wobbly, vaguely hippyish ambient background music, of the sort you’d expect to hear in a Scientology Org while they wave an e-meter around and size up your wallet. Then there’s the sound effects; every card the dealer turns over sets off a whooshy burst of white  noise , and every bet triggers the “mobile phone receiving a text message” alert. It’s disorientating; your eyes see poker, while your ears hear “Channel Five daytime quiz show”.

Happily, the poker itself is fantastic. There are two shows; the first is a full ring game, featuring the likes of Durrrr, Antonius, Laak, the excellent Niki Jedlicka and the truly awful Andrew Robl, and some Australian guy (mercifully not the one with the sodding crocodile), and the second episode is a heads up match between Durrrr and Antonius, who are clearly deeply in love with each other. (Get a room, guys! Oh, you did). And the stacks are DEEP; the minimum buy-in for the ring game is $200,000 (they don’t specify whether those are USD or AUD, I suspect the former), but Durrrr and Antonius decide to bring seven figure sums with them. I forget exactly how much Antonius is playing, but it’s something like $2,000,000. They sit down for the heads up match with $1,000,000 and $1,500,000 respectively.

Better yet, it’s a mixed  game; NLHE and (joy!) PLO. I’m delighted to see Omaha being played on the telly, and it doesn’t disappoint here; there’s one hand in particular which has to be seen to be believed, and several other merely fascinating hands. There’s also some spectacularly inept commentary from Tompkins in the heads up match, which… well, I’ll not spoiler it for you. Links below, and I’ll post some thoughts in the comments.

Watch it. It’s superb.

Episode 1 Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Episode 2 Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

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